START WITH YOURSELF
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| Always deal with yourself first. |
Let me be as simple as possible: anything you want to do starts with your. You are the first benefactor and your first audience; yes, no one else but you. Let’s imagine a young girl who loves to sing out of the reach of ears, you will always discover that she sings to herself in the bathroom when taking her bath, when doing the laundry, when washing the dishes, when walking along the road, etc. If she sings to herself, it means that she sings, and “herself” listens. So she assumes an inevitable dual personality. A little bit strange? But that’s just it.
Let’s also imagine that she notices that someone has been in a corner listening as she sings, one thing is always predictable here; she becomes shy and most probably stops singing. It’s normal. Inasmuch as she has a niggling desire that she wants her voice to be heard, she still convinces herself that she is not good enough to go public even after receiving appraisal from that same public. That’s inferiority complex!
I’m going to just define the term inferiority complex because she shouldn’t dwell much on it, but know that it is one gigantic enemy to self discovery and growth.
Inferiority complex is a sense of personal inferiority arising from conflict between the desire to be noticed and the fear of being humiliated.
So three things are paramount here to overcome this enemy;
v Love yourself enough: How you love yourself suggests to others how to love you. If you don’t love yourself, who will? Some microscopic mind would mistake your self-love for pride, but most of the times, people’s opinion don’t really count at this point.
v Invest in self: You are an asset, yea, that’s a fact. So to get the best out of yourself, invest your time, money, energy etc on yourself. Build yourself up,read books, watch clips, listen to wise people or audio to kill any doubt in you. Do things to keep yourself going, mingle with positive people, and always go for quality because quality investor will certainly be attracted to you for what they see in you.
v Be patient with self: Even if a very qualified person assures you that investing in self is easy, they check the person’s qualification if it’s really legit. A patient person is one with great understanding. You need to understand that you may fail sometimes, be delayed, and even be humiliated. But just know and constantly tell yourself that you are a work in progress because the difference between the words “here” and “there” is the absence of the letter “T” in the former which signifies TIME.
Also the common letter occurring in these three words; past, present and posterity is noticeably the letter “P” which signifies PATIENCE! So you see, during the time from “here’ to “there”, you must really be patient. Don’t you pressurize yourself, remember you are a work in progress, all you need is TIME.
The business press loves to create mythic heroes of industry and we love it, too, To a point.As much as we love a business visionary like, say, Steve Jobs–and we love him to pieces–we are not Steve Jobs, and never could be, nor should we. All leaders have their own unique talents, which they will use in different ways to bring out the best in themselves and others. Here are 5 ways to discover your own strongest qualities and put them to work in business and in life.
1. Don’t compare yourself with others–but do approach people who inspire, and even intimidate, you.
Are there people in your life who wow or even intimidate you? Are you jealous of them? Go up and introduce yourself, allow yourself to be a part of their lives, and even offer to contribute to their milieu if you are so inclined. If they have a quality you are charged by, perhaps you have not given yourself permission to explore and develop those sides of yourself? Consider aligning
yourself with people you feel competitive toward–it’s a new world and we have much to learn from each other.
2. Don’t concentrate on weaknesses, do concentrate on strengths.
First, find out what your strengths are. Go online and take a Briggs Meyers test, an Enneagram test, or buy the Gallup Strengths Finder 2.0 book. There are even more robust ways to discover your unique talents, abilities, and ways of thinking by talking with a career coach. Or try them all and see what works. Self-understanding and self-support is key.
Working on one’s weaknesses only brings misery and self-doubt. Concentrating on your strengths brings a better sense of fulfillment and forward progress.
3. Eliminate your weaknesses by partnering with others.
Albert Einstein was initially a failure who leaned heavily on his wife. Many now believe she ultimately helped him devise his famous equation. Let’s be honest: He was a dreamer with his head in the clouds (and thank goodness he was). He came to success in roundabout ways. His wife kept her head on straight and together they accomplished greatness. That is the value of having a partner and team, varieties of perspectives, talents, and skills to get the job done. How is your team?
Do you have someone’s back? Do they have yours? Are there complimentary skill sets involved? If you have people who believe in you, you can go far together. Whether it’s a mentor, employee, or co-worker, get their back and let them get yours.
4. Use failure as motivation.
Things aren’t always going to go your way, no matter how well you and your teams properly align with your goals. Sometimes we need a good kick to get us going. Sometimes we need the pain of failure to reset, revise, and reassess. Are you taking risks? Are you failing? If so, good going.
Winston Churchill failed grandly more than once, and was famously cast to the political “wilderness” and then came roaring back to lead the British resistance. Steve Jobs was fired from the company he founded but through persistence ultimately came back to save it from extinction. Hillary Clinton failed to win the presidency but then became a powerful and respected Secretary of State. Each of them, in their own way, failed, learned from their mistakes, and most importantly, persisted in the face of failure. Phoenix rising is the way of the world today and we are in the midst of its widespread occurrence.
5. Now is a time of pop-up engagement, leadership, and success.
Innovation demands the work of flexible teams who cooperate, co-lead, and co-create. Mr. Jobs was a hierarchical leader in a time of radical shift from singular creative to co-creative. Over time, he learned what he was best at and how to use his skills, talents, teams, and life lessons to
contribute in the best way he knew how. As a hierarchical leader, he succeeded in providing the tools you and I now use in this co-creative environment. Who would have thought it possible? We believe he did, and that he did not do it alone. We also believe you can do that too–on your own terms, with your own teams, and in your own way.
